Croquet Tournament!
by Parody-of-an-Angel
Summary: Oh you may think i seem serious, but don't judge on what you read. I'll delete myself if you can find a sillier story then me!


"Oh you may think I seem serious, but don't judge on what you read. I'll delete myself if you can find a sillier story then me"  
  
Disclaimer – I own everything except the things I don't own  
  
BTW, this story is going to have v. short chapters so ye be warned  
  
¸,ø ¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ ø,¸¸,ø ¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ ø,¸¸,ø ¤º°°º¤  
  
Parody-of-an-Angel: Hi peoples!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
$Peoples wave at insane author who uses dollar signs instead of asterixis  
  
P.O.A.A: Welcome to the silliest story ever ™!!!!!!!!! (This may not be the silliest one, in fact my friends is sillier but oh well – the rhyme sounded good!) In which the characters from Harry Potter hold a croquet tournament!! By the way, I just realised that the first 3 initials of my pen name stand for Prisoner of Azkaban!!!!! WOOT!!  
  
P.O.A.A: anyways, as I was saying, 16 select characters from HP will be playing in a croquet tournament!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The number will then reduce to 8, then 4, then 2 and finally 1 who will win...........................nothing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The Goblet of Fire itself who I rudely awoke to do this has chosen them! Now lets meet our victims, errm I mean contestants. Yes that's the word – contestants.  
  
$Drum roll$  
  
P.O.A.A: first up we have the greasy haired, overgrown bat who teaches Potions at Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry.........Severus Snape!!!!  
  
$Snape walks onto the field scowling$  
  
P.O.A.A: Next up we have the brightest thing ever to grace Hogwarts since they took down the disco ball and strobe light in the great hall..........Hermione Granger!!!  
  
$Hermione prances out and stands next to Snape much to his delight, errm disgust$  
  
P.O.A.A: After her we have the boy-who-lived-so-that-authors-can-make-fun- of-him and survivor of the Avada Kedavra curse...............Harry Potter!!  
  
$Harry walks out, looking around suspiciously for Scarhead fangirls$  
  
P.O.A.A: Then there is the half giant Hagrid, keeper of grounds and keys at Hogwarts and man of many pockets!  
  
$Hagrid walks out among Madame Maxine wannabes, whom he shakes off sending them flying$  
  
P.O.A.A: Next up is the esteemed headmaster of Hogwarts and the only wizard Voldemort (insert terrified looks here) was ever afraid of............Albus Dumbledore!!  
  
$Dumbledore walks out wearing neon orange robes with polka dots and starts break dancing$  
  
P.O.A.A: Riiiiiiight. Anyways, the next person to grace us with their presence is the son of Lucius Malfoy and sworn enemy of Harry Potter............Draco Malfoy!!  
  
$Draco struts out and is promptly bombarded by catcalls and lingerie$  
  
P.O.A.A: $rolls eyes$ typical bimbo fangirls. Anyways, our next contestant is coming from beyond the grave.............Sirius Black!!!  
  
$Sirius Black walks out looking very corpse like, but still manages to attract catcalls$  
  
P.O.A.A: we also have with us three red haired, freckled, fiery, drop dead poor Weasleys! The youngest and only female who was controlled by Voldemort in her first year, Ginny Weasley, the head boy and pompous prefect who betrayed his family when he joined the Ministry, Percy Weasley. The best friend of Harry Potter and guy who has a fear of spiders and Hermione, Ron Weasley!  
  
$They walk out as each of their names are called$  
  
P.O.A.A: With us today we also have Peeves the Poltergeist who insists he is only here so that he can disrupt the game and perve on the ladies!!  
  
$Peeves floats out emptying ink onto the contestants already assembled on the lawn including P.O.A.A$  
  
P.O.A.A: grrrrrr. You will be punished in due time my friend. When you least expect it............  
  
P.O.A.A: $mood swing$ Another person to be joining us is Argus Filch, caretaker of Hogwarts and murderer of his cat Mrs Norris!!  
  
Filch: I did not murder her I tell you, my hands accidentally picked up the cat and dropped her into Snape's cauldron!  
  
P.O.A.A: yeah right and I'm an angel. Our next contestant is a dark creature of the night otherwise known as a werewolf but don't let that turn you off, he's a really nice guy when you get to know him!! Remus Lupin!!  
  
$a werewolf runs onto the field and starts to attack an innocent bystander$  
  
P.O.A.A: hey, it's not a full moon!!!  
  
Lupin: $Transforms back into a human$ woops!  
  
P.O.A.A: no problemo! Anyways, we also have death eater extraordinaire Lucius Malfoy!  
  
$Malfoy senior walks out with Narcissa wannabes clinging to him, who he quickly disposes of with a quick Avada$  
  
P.O.A.A: $cowers behind herself$ um...next is Cornelius Fudge, stupid idiot who won't accept that Voldemort is back and is in denial!!  
  
$Fudge walks out just in time to see Lucius perform the spell but says nothing as money is exchanged in full view of everyone$  
  
P.O.A.A: Isn't anyone going to say or do anything??????????  
  
$Silence$ $a hay bundle rolls by$ $someone coughs$  
  
P.O.A.A: $sigh$ oo,  
  
P.O.A.A: Maybe Fudge; our last contestant can convince you that Voldemort is indeed back. May I introduce to you witches and wizards............Lord Voldemort!!!!  
  
$Voldemort walks out looking menacing in his black robe that covers everything except for his red eyes, if you could call them eyes$  
  
$Everybody gasps or screams or feints or gapes or runs up to ask him for his autograph including P.O.A.A$  
  
¸,ø ¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ ø,¸¸,ø ¤º°°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°°º¤ ø,¸¸,ø ¤º°°º¤  
  
well, that was.........different to what I usually write  
  
3 golden rules of life  
  
READ REVIEW DON'T FLAME 


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